Just Thought Pieces
Dreams
A reminder to self on the lessons of responsibility
It’s the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.
To realize one’s destiny is a person’s only obligation. — The Alchemist
Everyone is born with dreams. As children, our imaginations run wild. You play games where you act out who you wish to be. You act out your dreams coming true. In a way, you know as a child, what you want in life. You understand your purpose. But it’s a purpose that can’t quite be captured with words or even pictures.
This purpose — You know without knowing. You just have feelings. You only know the direction by doing and feeling. You know what you like and don’t like. You know how it feels. It is pure innocence — a pure understanding untainted by society. It’s not quite the same as saying “I know I want to be a clown.” It’s more along the lines of, “I enjoy the feeling of making people laugh by saying something different and risky.” It’s your intuition. Your inner compass.
But as we grow up and go through schooling, you are taught that there are ways the world works and that we should follow that path because everyone else is doing it.
Soon, you start caring too much about what other people think of you and buy into the idea that you should be doing what everyone else is doing or else…you’re going to be left behind.
You sacrifice your curiosity, your individuality, and your self-understanding to mold to fit in with the others, just cause. Your perception of self-worth becomes dependent on other people’s perceived perception of you.
It becomes an obsession to compare your self with others to feel like you are headed somewhere, the place where everyone is trying to go, which doesn’t exist. It’s a false magnet, leading you to the wrong pole.
That’s when you realize none of this is making you happy. None of this is making you feel alive.
Throughout your life, you find sparks of creativity, inspiration, signs of a vibrant life. These are usually “feelings” when you talk about your passions and obsessions. You talk about how alive it made you feel. And how “if only” followed by “I shouldn't”. Because you’re afraid of failing. Afraid of losing what you have worked so hard to gain. Afraid of losing your identity and facade you’ve worked so hard to create to convince others of how worthy you are.
You fear losing “respect” from others, therefore you sacrifice respect for yourself and your individuality. Afraid to be judged. Afraid to be seen for who you really are. Thus, neglecting yourself. I understand. It’s hard going against the grain of your own culture.
Sometimes, you just have to go to the extreme depth of your lowest lows to realize that what you needed and wanted was in you all along. It was the voice you have learned to silence for so long.
The deepest introspections are usually the most painful ones. It requires opening up layers you’ve spent so much energy trying to ignore and cover-up (from yourself).
It requires strength and persistence. It requires accepting the world as it is, not as how you perceive it to be. It requires accepting yourself.
Most of all, it requires responsibility. When you take responsibility, you learn that only you have the true power to make any changes to yourself.
Responsibility, if understood and owned, gives you power. Tremendous power.
That’s when you learn that you can change your circumstance if you really willed it to be.
True power does not come easily.
It requires believing.
It requires dreaming.
XOXO Steph
Thanks for reading! I am an Acupuncturist and Chinese Medicine Practitioner with a clinic in San Francisco. Learn more about what I do and see more of my writing at https://www.stephaniewuacupuncture.com.
